OLD AGE ADAGE

OLD AGE ADAGE Victorino P. Mapa I intend to live forever. So far, so good. ----o---- I was born in 1930.. And the room next to me was 1931. ----o---- I’m not afraid of death. I just don’t want to be around when it happens. ----o---- Hypochondria is the only disease I haven’t got. ----o---- The best thing about Alzheimer’s disease is that you always keep meeting new friends. ----o---- Eternity is a terrible thought. I mean, where’s it going to end? ----o---- Be nice to your kids.They’re the ones who will be choosing your nursing home. ----o---- A clear conscience is the sign of a bad memory. ----o---- If exercise is good for you why do athletes retire at age 35? ----o---- Death is nature’s way of telling you to slow down. ----o---- He who hesitates is probably right. ----o---- I always wanted to be somebody – but I guess I should have been more specific. ----o---- Been there, done that, can’t remember most of it. ----o---- I went to buy some camouflage clothing. I could’nt find it. ----o---- Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die ----o---- The only way I can hear heavy breathing again these days is to take up jogging. ----o---- Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician. ----o---- Marriage is nature’s way of preventing people from fighting with strangers. ----o---- Old Lady : Do you remember if we ever had mutual orgasm? Old Man: No, we always had AllState. ----o---- and going back to the womb ….. Knock knock Who’s there? Keith Keith who? Keith me, thweetheart